Shadowbutterfly
07-30-2009, 02:06 AM
What your about to read is actually true, and not something I made up for a character. I've never had a very good relationship with my father, so this is just my feelings.. And what I plan to say to him one day.. Please tell me what you think of it.
In The End~
You always told me I wasn't pretty, always told me I was ruining my life, always trying to shape my life to the way you wanted it.
I may not be able to tell you this now, but I'll tell you one day.
You've always tried to shape my life to the way you wanted it. Wanted me to be another you. Told me I was worthless, abused me, made me doubt myself, even made me think I really need you.
I may have needed you, just long enough to reach the age where I began to realize what you do and what you say is wrong. But I don't need you anymore.
You tell me who I can and cannot love, that's not your decision. If I want to do something that you did, let me. I don't care if you made a mistake, your mistakes aren't mine. I need to grow up, and you won't let me. How will I know what's right and wrong, if you don't let me go?
But that's it, isn't it? I'm just another.. thing to you. Something to play with until I serve no more purpose. Well I'm sorry, I'm not some doll you can just play with and chuck into a basket.
Your angry, and your depressed. I can see it, and you take it out on me and everyone around you. You've lost your friends, because you are no longer you. Your cold.. and filled with hatred.
You insult me, because it makes you feel better to see me put down.. Well, your words fall on deaf ears. I don't look for your approval anymore.. I don't even look for the love you should have for me, because I know no matter how hard I try to find it, I never will. You've locked it away..
I used to think I hated you. And at times I still do.. But over all, I pity you. You grew up better than I did, even if your parents weren't close to you. I've suffered, more than you would ever know. Yes, I pity you..
And to me, pity is worse than hatred.
Soon, I'll be able to be free from you, and then I wonder what will happen to you. You had a good beginning to your life.. I didn't.
But in the end, I know I'm going to be the one with the happy ending, and you aren't.
In The End~
You always told me I wasn't pretty, always told me I was ruining my life, always trying to shape my life to the way you wanted it.
I may not be able to tell you this now, but I'll tell you one day.
You've always tried to shape my life to the way you wanted it. Wanted me to be another you. Told me I was worthless, abused me, made me doubt myself, even made me think I really need you.
I may have needed you, just long enough to reach the age where I began to realize what you do and what you say is wrong. But I don't need you anymore.
You tell me who I can and cannot love, that's not your decision. If I want to do something that you did, let me. I don't care if you made a mistake, your mistakes aren't mine. I need to grow up, and you won't let me. How will I know what's right and wrong, if you don't let me go?
But that's it, isn't it? I'm just another.. thing to you. Something to play with until I serve no more purpose. Well I'm sorry, I'm not some doll you can just play with and chuck into a basket.
Your angry, and your depressed. I can see it, and you take it out on me and everyone around you. You've lost your friends, because you are no longer you. Your cold.. and filled with hatred.
You insult me, because it makes you feel better to see me put down.. Well, your words fall on deaf ears. I don't look for your approval anymore.. I don't even look for the love you should have for me, because I know no matter how hard I try to find it, I never will. You've locked it away..
I used to think I hated you. And at times I still do.. But over all, I pity you. You grew up better than I did, even if your parents weren't close to you. I've suffered, more than you would ever know. Yes, I pity you..
And to me, pity is worse than hatred.
Soon, I'll be able to be free from you, and then I wonder what will happen to you. You had a good beginning to your life.. I didn't.
But in the end, I know I'm going to be the one with the happy ending, and you aren't.